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Lead From The Bench

6/24/2019

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What is your favorite summer childhood memory? Maybe it is a beach memory, playing outside all day, going to the pool, or time with family and friends. Personally, one of my favorite summer memories is having the time to read whatever books I “wanted” versus the ones I “had” to read in school. I am witnessing my daughter have the same excitement of choosing her own books. She said, “I don’t have time to read what I want during school, so this is a nice change.”
Reading is a getaway from the busy of my mind. I see new perspectives from other writers, and as a writer, I am in awe of how the words magically tell a story to inspire or take us to another place as we feel what the characters are feeling. I love to use book references to aid in making points with those in my life. Abby Wambach’s book, Wolfpack is one I immediately wanted to share and read with my children, especially my son. Even though he is 11, he still likes when I read to him, so I read the book aloud. When we got to the chapter “Lead from the Bench” I could see his interest rise. He made the All-Star baseball team as a supporting player, not a starter. I was witnessing how the transition from starting to being benched was impacting him. When I read the following excerpt below, I knew this was the perfect way to start a conversation with him about how being on the bench is just as important as being on the field.
Abby said:
"Here's what's important: You are allowed to be disappointed when it feels like life's benched you. What you aren't allowed to do is miss your opportunity to lead from the bench. If you're not a leader on the bench, don't call yourself a leader on the field."
In this chapter, Abby discusses how she found herself on the bench not playing in her final World Cup at the end of her U.S. Women’s National professional soccer career. Abby said, “You’ve scored more international goals in your sport than any human being on the planet. You’ve co-captained and led Team USA to victory after victory for the past decade. And you and your coach sit down and decide together that you won’t be a starter for the remainder of your final World Cup. Instead, you’ll come off the bench.”
After I finished reading this chapter aloud, I asked him how he was feeling about his team and his role. He said, “I want us to win even if I don’t play. I can eat my sunflower seeds and start team cheers.” I laughed as of course he would find something food related to inspire him. As he went back to his team, I saw the shift in his perspective and once again reminded of the power of sharing our stories and experiences with others. And guess what? After being supportive of his team and insisting upon being the first player to arrive at practice and staying focused on being his best, he ended up being able to start in a game. I told him how proud I was of his attitude and reminded him that a positive and team player attitude will get you far in life.
What books have inspired you to make a positive change? I would love to hear from you and add to my summer reading list.
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Together is Better

6/10/2019

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Contributions from Priscila Nagalli and Paloma Bentes

The Camino de Santiago or the Way of Saint James is an ancient pilgrimage route dating back to the 9th century to Santiago, Spain. It is believed that St. James is buried in the Cathedral of Santiago. You can start walking in France, Portugal, or Spain. The total route is over 800 km. We did 115 km (72 miles) starting in Sarria and ending in Santiago. It was an enriching cultural and spiritual experience to travel the countryside by foot.

My friend and co-worker, Priscila, asked me to join her and a friend on the journey. Before the trip, Priscila had mentioned the concept of “we” versus “me.” As we walked, we experienced this concept as we felt our energies form a community of “us.” I also saw this sense of community in the other groups walking – embracing the idea that together is better.

Each year, I embrace living life holistically and in a way in which I show up fully in all scenarios. In this piece, the concept of “we” is inspired by our journey walking the countryside of Spain. These lessons can be applied personally and professionally.

1.      Diversity of Ideas – Discussions with others can broaden your horizon. Priscila elevated our trip by sharing her knowledge of highly recommended accommodations and restaurants. Paloma enhanced our daily walking by reminding us to take time to pace ourselves and enjoy the journey. I suggested we do daily foot massage and yoga to support our bodies during our rigorous journey. I was thankful, as these suggestions contributed to my being able to complete the walk. Paloma was grateful that yoga and massage allowed her knee pain to subside.

Culture Infusion – Survey Your Team Regularly: At Actualize, we thrive when we obtain feedback and survey our people often. Recently, we surveyed our team to check in on a challenging project. The results showed us that our team wanted more dedicated client-specific support, and they made suggestions on how we could meet their needs. We immediately set up dedicated times and personnel to support their request.

2.      Focus on Your Strengths – As we traveled, the three of us innately took on a role that suited us best. Priscila was our leader, organizing and guiding us each day. Paloma had the fortitude of a warrior, powering through multiple sicknesses and injuries, showing us how will can guide the way. I was the caregiver tending to blister care, teaching daily yoga, and sharing natural remedies for our ailments.

Culture Infusion – Goal Setting: We counsel our team on aligning their goals to their aspirations and what lights them up. As we focus on what we love, work and life flow more easily.

3.      Sense of Community – When you are walking the Camino and witness the success and determination of others, their energy pulls you forward. When you feel you cannot take another step, you see other walkers and cyclists in the distance achieving a common goal. Being part of this larger community is a powerful force that propels you to continue.

Culture Infusion – Focus on People: We genuinely care about our people and building teams that work together. We have Google email groups where we can ask questions. Our people come together to support one another and share a common goal. It is beautiful to witness the support towards resolution.

4.      Build Bonds – When you share in a challenge such as the Camino, you build bonds and memories you will never forget. As each of us needed a boost, the others would support and lift our vibe. When my feet broke out in a heat rash and blisters, Priscila and Paloma helped put cold compresses on them and got medicine from the pharmacy. If I did not have them, I might have wanted to give up, but I kept moving forward to foster our team bond and to complete the journey together.

Culture Infusion – Foster Team Connection: We love to have social and cause-related events to build our team bonds outside of work. We have an upcoming event in which we will help homeless people learn how to interview for jobs. Priscila and I discussed expanding our team building experience with additional activities and work opportunities before and after our time of giving back to the community. Supporting our community has always been a big part of our culture at Actualize Consulting. Now, with the strength of deep connection I experienced on the Camino, I feel we will do even more meaningful work.

Time Magazine’s piece on Blue Zones supports that we live longer and healthier lives if we are focused on community and healthy lifestyles. Many times, I find myself thinking or saying I can do this alone. After walking the Camino with friends and having time to contemplate life, I now more than ever believe that together is better. Life is richer with experiences and moments of sharing.

What are you trying to accomplish on your own? Who can you share your ideas, struggles, or solutions with today? ​
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